Turns Out I’m Crazy

Description

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Lu Zhengfei killed Chen Qianqing.

He disabled Chen Qianqing’s legs, and blinded his eyes, locking him up with chains in his house. Then, he watched with his eyes wide as he died.

Injuries inflicted in the name of love would always end in tragedy.

Did Lu Zhengfei regret it? Of course, he did. And so, God gave him another chance.

But this time, he found that he himself—became Chen Qianqing.

Associated Names
One entry per line
我原来是个神经病
Related Series
N/A
Recommendations
Sickly Tyrannical (3)
Quickly Wear the Face of the Devil (2)
Supernatural Movie Actor App (2)
Quick Transmigration: Fate Trading System (1)
Kill the Lights (1)
A Smile from the Villain (1)
Recommendation Lists
  1. High Priority To-Read List
  2. TBR (GL/BL) 11
  3. Dark and twisted (bl)
  4. Black/Red flags bl
  5. seme protag danmei

Latest Release

Date Group Release
11/23/24 Shanghai Fantasy extra part1
11/23/24 Shanghai Fantasy c73
11/23/24 Shanghai Fantasy c72
11/23/24 Shanghai Fantasy c71
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c67
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c66
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c68
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c65
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c64
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c63
11/22/24 Shanghai Fantasy c62
11/21/24 Shanghai Fantasy c61
11/21/24 Shanghai Fantasy c60
11/21/24 Shanghai Fantasy c58
11/21/24 Shanghai Fantasy c54
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47 Reviews sorted by


1Sami
1Sami rated it
April 8, 2020
Status: c51
I've been following this story for 2 years now and I just couldn't wait for more updates so I started to MTL it. It's one of my favorite novels and if you stick with it, I guarantee you won't be let down! The way the MCs thoughts are shown and hide it switches POV so you can see what the ML is thinking is great. And how the MC reacts when faced with himself is amazing!
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dona
dona rated it
March 23, 2019
Status: c13
Seeing the pitiful few reviews, I decided to leave one as well in hope more people will give this novel a chance. Now usually (99% of times) I´m very harsh and stingy when it comes to giving 4-5 stars, so it´s been a while I´ve been generous with my reviews. I actually got hooked and read all 13 chapters in one hour.

It´s about obsessive, unhealthy love-which I love reading about, but the author has done a twist. There are plenty of novels about body swaps, but what´s unique about this... more>> one is that the ab*ser, ML, enters the body of his captive, the one whom he longed for and tortured for so many years. And now he has to suffer for all that he had done by his own hands.

Truthfully this deserves at best 4 stars because the story was a little bit unrealistic (in modern times it´s near impossible to torture someone to THAT extent without receiving help), if the author had set it in ancient times then it would be more real. Also the writing itself leaves much to be desired, it´s amateurish and not as descriptive as I wish it was, however the plot really hooked me, I don´t think I´ve ever seen a plot similar to this one. Really excited for future updates! <<less
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Queen Cassiopeia
Queen Cassiopeia rated it
December 5, 2024
Status: Completed
I’m rating the story this way not because I glorify the tags and the characters, but because the story was such a uniquely portrayed complexity — I don’t think I have ever read something like this.

Usually, we get novels where rebirths happen to previously s*um people for them to be given a chance at redemption, but I think the way the MC had his redemption was the kind where he doesn’t just magically realize all his wrongs in one significant event; he gets to realize how complex he is both... more>> in the past and present gradually — from there, he gets the punishment he deserved by acknowledging just how twisted he really was through live experience, courtesy of the ML. He sets things right for Chen Qianqing, while resigning to his fate simultaneously. We witness both internal and external struggles, the non-glorification of dark themes, and the mentions of other such psychological topics.

It’s unique but dark, too, where you don’t see the line of right and wrong when it comes to the MC’s perspective. It’s a very interesting premise; if someone’s ever up for something new and complicated, this would be a weirdly intriguing read. However, if you’re not up to being (perhaps) unsettled and opening perspectives very widely, this wouldn’t be for you. <<less
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ilovelightnovels.manhwas
ilovelightnovels.manhwas rated it
December 1, 2024
Status: c30
My Review:

First and foremost, I typically don't read BL (Boys' Love) novels. I only engage with them if the romance isn't the main focus or if something else in the story piques my interest. The reason for this is that I'm a lesbian, so narratives centered on romance without women involved do not appeal to me. You might wonder, "But isn't this a romance?" To that, I would respond: Who reads a story about a rapist and their victim for the romance? I certainly don't.

I found this particular story interesting... more>> because it features an ab*ser/rapist who is sent back in time and trapped in his victim's body. He must experience everything his victim went through. It's intriguing to see him realize that he and his victim might have had a chance together if he had just paid more attention to what was happening around him and been more observant. It's quite ironic that a character who believed he understood everything about his victim's situation turned out to be the most oblivious to it.

Another interesting aspect is his regret over his past naivety that caused him to drift farther apart from his victim. However, he never regrets imprisoning or physically abusing her. Even when the main character suffers from his past actions, he doesn't empathize with his victim after experiencing the same trauma he inflicted on her in his past life. Instead, he seems either calmly focused on how to escape the situation or tries to block it out.

Overall, it's very ironic that he chose to suffer as his victim did, yet he never regrets his actions. He merely reflects, "If I had known, I wouldn't have acted that way."

The characters are compelling and complex; they are flawed like real humans, make mistakes, and sometimes never learn from them. All the characters feel realistic.

The plot was engaging for the reasons mentioned above.

Rating: 5/5 (I used Grammarly to improve the review) <<less
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BL-lover
BL-lover rated it
November 23, 2024
Status: Completed
5 star for me since it’s a it’s my first time reading something like this.

Its about redemption and regret.

... more>>
Spoiler

future MC x Past mc

so basically he loved himself.

future MC is a completely tr*sh human being. He is childish and he ab*sed his “lover” in the past. His lover died. And MC also killed himself.

but he woke up in the past and in the body of his lover.

Now he can see and experience what his lover went through. He experienced the ab*se and betrayal of the people around his lover since he is inside it. He also experienced the ab*se that his “future” self will do.

anyway MC is resigned to his situation since he regarded it as a punishment for the shits that he did to his lover. He concluded that his punishment is to experience the pain what his lover went through.

anyway it can still be considered HE even if he ends up with himself.

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please message me if you have recommendations similar to this one. <<less
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JayeWhy
JayeWhy rated it
March 27, 2024
Status: Completed
This was really well-written. As many reviewers noted, both main characters felt like different people, and although this is self-cest, the progression of 'love' comes in a very natural (dog-blooded and angsty) way. It was really interesting seeing the MC be faced with the consequences of his actions first-hand, and I would go as far as to say that rather than self-love, this novel reads more like self-acceptance. MC is full of self-loathing in the beginning, and as the novel progresses, you can see him start to accept and forgive... more>> himself for his actions and admit how flawed he was and how doomed their relationship (with og lover) is from the very beginning. The novel's very poignant and I cried through like two-thirds of it. <<less
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waiting for it to rain
waiting for it to rain rated it
March 10, 2024
Status: Completed
Wow... just... wow. Honestly I'd like to start by saying this had been on my 'to read' list for a very long time - simply because I really like this author. However, I've always been put off by the description, LOL. Alas, I ran out of things to read and decided to give it a go and WOW. It was really worth it. If I had to speculate, the reason why the ratings on this novel is only 4.4 is due to people who can't handle selfcest. The plot, the... more>> writing, the characterisation - as long as you get past the selfcest (which by the way, not weird at all?) then you'll realise how amazing all of it is.

NOTE: Despite the heavy themes, there are quite a few instances with comedic undertone, so don't think the read will be all depressing. Theres some light parts, I promise! Xi ZiXu is known for her story gap-moe...

The book is had sufficient drama, not too much - just right. I'm surprised at how well the author wrote the romance? I thought it'd be difficult to accept but the redemption and the progression of the characters, especially the main leads, was really smooth. Every thing flowed well and it just CLICKS, you know?

By the end, the two characters are very, very different. So you don't have to worry. I also found it a bit hard to picture - but you'll see clearly that the main leads are two very different people. <<less
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cutekittensmeow
cutekittensmeow rated it
July 8, 2022
Status: Completed
A novel about self love.

And dog blood. It reads a lot like a wife chasing novel but the wife is long gone.

I found the psychology of this novel to be really interesting. The way the MCML and ML interact is fascinating. They're the same person but one is a decade older and massively depressed because they had to deal with the consequences of their own actions.

The ab*se only happens in flashbacks and isn't graphic. There's r*pe but it's not graphic. The ML is your typical yandere, controlling with a terrible... more>> temper. Watching him learn how dumb he is is quite satisfying. It's very dramatic. I strongly recommend.

I will say that the novel doesn't read like a romance because the MCML never really seems to be in love. He just seems like he's accepted his situation and wants to be vicariously happy through the ML. But I still enjoyed the ending, I think everyone got what they deserve. <<less
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Ameto
Ameto rated it
June 13, 2021
Status: c31
I love this story. It is funny and heart warming in pov of former ML eiei
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IvaAres
IvaAres rated it
May 30, 2021
Status: Completed
This was weird. In the beginning I couldn't wrap my head around how the MC may fall in love with his younger self and kept trying to find hints that maybe the Chen dude is actually in the body of the younger MC and wants to torture the MC just like he tortured him in their previous life. But in the end I had to accept that this was "selfcest". Though in a way its understandable cuz the way the MC said "if I don't love myself then who will?"... more>> wasn't wrong.

Their are some mtls that kill all your brain cells. BUT the mtl for this novel was really good and I could understand almost everything. If it wasn't for thr fact that I already knew I was mtling the novel I would have actually thought it had been done by a real person who translated it. It is much better than other mtls. <<less
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etsuhun
etsuhun rated it
June 24, 2020
Status: Completed
This novel had all of the tags that I would normally steer away from, but the summary reeled me in. I mean who wouldn't? The first chapter hooked me in, and just a series of dogblood and face slap on the ML's side afterwards.

One of the best transmigration novels I've read, and I mostly read soft danmeis. Would reread this in the future. Highly recommended!
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yukicchi
yukicchi
January 10, 2025
Status: Completed
I actually don't know how to rate the story. This is the first self-cest novel I read so I got a weird feeling about it.

I always feel annoyed at the ML's personality all throughout the novel. The pain he has gone through in the new world is not enough. Everytime the ML r*ped the MC, I feel so sad of what the OG CQ experienced in the previous world.

This has a HE, but I feel like the MC just compromised with the ML. I doubt that he truly loves him,... more>> he might have shown affection but it's not the same as the strong love he has with the OG CQ. Throughout the novel, I don't feel their chemistry at all. I still hate the ML till the end. <<less
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Ilayrieg
Ilayrieg
December 29, 2024
Status: Completed
So where should I start.!?

(I loved every part of this one)

Is it a redemption story I don't think But is it a revenge story I will definitely say YES !!

But who is getting revenge against who is the problem there is no MC or ML here... it's just single person... who is living and at the same time dying. I really love how MC sees the past selves of him and is capable of differentiating what he has done to OG 'quanqing ' and willing to endure everythingand... more>> also how he understood the safe world he originally thought has built of OG quanqing was a mere illusion.. the charector suffering and pace a plot was very intriguing and my rmtears couldn't stop sometimes..I really know I shouldn't rationally sympathize with MC and ML but I find sometimes they are really a pitiful fools

I really loved if they where together but I also wished they have never met....

WAS THIS STORY A HAPPY ENDING?

Spoiler

I SAY NO because at the end no one got the real love of OG MC... at the end the one who loved ML was ML himselves and I really cried at part where MC envious monologue but alas at the end he he could atleast see the smile at his past selves and they both were happy and OG MC forgived him.. I was so thankful atleast he got freedom from that mess

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You should read this it's a solid one for me and any one who wants to read this I will definitely give a thumbs up.. happy reading..I loved it a lot.. the author a unique one and I love it

(Ps. I don't know how to review but I thought I just want to pour out every about this novel somewhere) <<less
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Chilisauce6363636
Chilisauce6363636 rated it
August 23, 2024
Status: --
I really appreciated how the author made this as realistic as possible considering the crazy premise. The MC’s mindset and thought process, despite being f***ed up, are understandable. Towards the middle I felt bored but couldn’t stop reading. The ending was honestly the best possible ending the author could’ve chosen but I did wish for a little more fluff. This was just not the story for fluff.
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nene-77
nene-77 rated it
February 25, 2024
Status: c70
I couldn't accept the fact that they were the same person ML and MC it's kinda of weird but I understand that they each have different personality it's just weird doing all that with yourself

Spoiler

The way of the story is different from the first life for ML

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eleen
eleen rated it
January 18, 2023
Status: Completed
I don't know, I've mixed feelings about this novel. It's definitely different from other novel, for sure. Also, please check the tags carefully before reading this novel.

MC does hateful things that leads to death of his lover and he understood how deep his obsessions were. After he reborn, he suffered even more. I hate the top MC but also feel sympathetic. This novel brought tears in my eyes.

For those who don't like this type of genre, then refrain yourselves from reading this.
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Kerry976
Kerry976 rated it
December 2, 2022
Status: c44
Scum. Pe*vert. Yander. (Not in a romanticised way)

That's ML for you... or MC. They are the same persons from different timelines. Honestly, no normal person can understand or handle ML's twisted love. He loves MC (uh.. not MC, but the original host) and maybe does anything for him and at the same time, he r*pes and ab*ses him... Seriously, it's scary.

The psychological aspect is so beautifully expressed I wish I could read it till the end.

It's a unique aspect.
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Mokey
Mokey
February 5, 2021
Status: Completed
Im not sure if I like the the novel or not and my English is not so good but I tried to give the review due to the pain in my heart... first chapter with the real Chen Qianqing was so tense, cruel and I hate Lu Zhengfei. How come you break your love one leg just to make sure he is with you, some more he blinded him and the caused of him died. Oh my.. its so sad and make me want to kill Lu Zhengfei. However the... more>> sweet revenge that Chen Qianqing have is so sweet and I like it. After the reborn, the Lu Zhengfei that now is Chen Qianqing and he is also suffered, I like the second chapter because he can feel how tortured the real Chen Qianqing is, the tortured feeling is not due to abusive of the current Lu Zhengfei, but because he know how bad he was in his past life, he believed of his cousin accusation and dont even try to understand the suffering that the original Chen Qianqing have. He also suffered due to the current Lu Zhengfei received his love and tolerence, while the original him not.

If.. If he just open his heart and treat the real Chen Qianqing nicer than both of them will not be suffering. I like the end of the novel as both of them are happy <<less
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battered melon
battered melon rated it
January 15, 2021
Status: --
Amazing, novel. I totally recommend reading it. The plot is interesting? It lives up to the psychological tag. Very good plot. Might be a little rude but MC is kinda mental, but still a good MC. Good characters, good plot. This is one of my favorite novels, I find it hard to dislike the characters, so pretty much good everything. There's a lot of r*pe and ab*se but that's all up there in the tags.

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baruna
baruna rated it
October 3, 2020
Status: Completed
This was also addicting lol, I finished the entire novel in a few days. Not at all a difficult read in Chinese if you're fluent.

One should definitely reading the warnings/tags before casting judgment and reviewing since there is a lot of morally dubious behavior going on in this novel. It's not for the fainthearted lol. But what made me give this story five stars is precisely because of the unusual-ness of the novel.

MC kills his one-true-love & ends up in the past.... but he's in his one-true-love's body. He... more>> now has to face off with HIMSELF as the primary antagonist. There is a lot of psychological introspection, manipulative maneuvering, and just general internal reflection on life and karma. I enjoyed this aspect - how often do you get to read a novel where it's MC vs. MC... and then the main pairing ends up as MC/MC?? And the focus is not on romance but on the psychology of it all?? Anyway, I liked this, though the general feeling while reading this won't necessarily fill you with satisfaction, it'll give you something to think on. <<less
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