First, as this is a fanfiction of Blue Archive, a gacha game with an English release, I believe it is fair for me to expect that the translation work will attempt to follow the game's localization. Particularly with regards to the school club names under Trinity, where the majority of the story takes place. There are three clubs that are often mentioned and yet gets inconsistently named every time:

* Justice Task Force (often TL'd as "Justice Realization Committee", sometimes the former),

* Remedial Knights ("Knights Hospitaller" in TL, but usually informal names like "aid club" or something)

* Make-Up Work Club ("Supplementary Lessons Club" in TL, and even that tends to change sometimes)

I have checked the Blue Archive Wiki (Fandom, ew) and the names that the TL have decided to use are recognized as a proper translation, except for the third one where the wiki calls it the "Supplementary Lessons *Department*". This would be fine, but the TL keeps alternating between the general translation names and the EN localization names, or making up a completely new name for the clubs. This is really annoying. The only real mercy here is that the Tea Party is always correctly referred to as such.

Second, is the unchecked use of AI. I know that AI is used because they forgot to remove the AI response line before the actual translation text in one of the chapters. I don't really care about how the TL accomplishes their work, the only thing I ask is for them to thoroughly check it for errors and inconsistencies before publishing it. I should not be expected to be proofreading it for them. Some errors are so egregious that I refuse to believe that the TL even bothered to skim the text before posting it. I count two instances where a TL note was included in some paragraph, only to say "no proper equivalent in english" as they just said the most appropriate word to use instead. The TL note can assure me that the work is not entirely AI translated, so it's all the more frustrating when-

Third, and the worst one, is just the really awkward phrasing that often comes up especially around chapter 40+. The translation is using English words, yet it feels like the translator still thinks in the structure of Korean? You get phrases like "The Millenium Festival, which was long if long, and short if short...". I had to run it with a friend to recognize what it was trying to say. It really ruins the story so much. Events stop making sense. There is an entire festival arc, and the narration leading up to it describes it as something planned by Trinity, but towards the end, its called the Millenium Festival. Many times I wanted to throw my phone in frustration from the incoherent word soup I'm trying to read through.

An extra thing, I'm not quite sure if an intentional feature of the fanfiction or yet another sin of the translator, is the implied presence of male students. "Guy" is sometimes a general term for any person but I believe it is still used to refer to a man, and of course its supported by the related male pronouns when it comes up in the story. There are many fight scenes in the novel and the MC is often described beating up "a guy". It would be a big thing to mess up if this was never implied in the original text.

Extra extra things:

* Ushio Noa is called Noah in the text. Student names were the one thing it got mostly right, but dang...

* They really butchered the prologue lines of the Eden Treaty story. Those opening paragraphs are almost sacred to those that hold the Eden Treaty arc with high regard. It's kind of a shame.

* There are Korean and Japanese honorifics all inconsistently being passed around. With all these issues, it would already be a big ask to write out honorifics entirely, but maybe keeping them to one language is possible?

Those are some petty complaints I couldn't work into the main three grievances.

Then comes the yuri. Not at all sexually explicit or anything but it's really there. Sora is now in a relationship with the three hosts of the Tea Party. Implied #1 being Mika, with Nagisa being kinda jealous, and Seia just happy to be included. This kind of development is the beauty of fanfiction. You will never get an arc like that in the actual game (or maybe you can? Isakusan did leave already... nah Nexon won't ever approve it).

Beyond that progression, Sora's presence has significantly altered the plot of the Eden Treaty in many other ways.

First, and I think the one that I found most unsatisfying, is the dampened impact of the Hifumi speech. What was originally this inspiring, albeit cheesy, speech when all hope was lost is now kind of inappropriate since the circumstances aren't as dire because of Sora's sheer presence.

Second, Mika is resolved really early. She did not collapse from the guilt, we do not get the Kyrie Eleison moment. Seia also did not suffer to the point of losing her foresight powers. Sora intervened heavily in these two instances and it really affected how the Eden Treaty ended, which brings me to:

Third, the Arius Squad got smoothly folded into Trinity. A happy ending for their absolutely miserable treatment under Beatrice. In the original, Saori's Squad ended up in hiding after the events of Eden Treaty, but here they have been assigned as bodyguards of the Tea Party. Convenient, as originally assigned bodyguard (Sora) is now the Tea Party's collective girlfriend.

I also want to mention the alteration made for the Saori begging and kneeling scene. In the game, the scene is only between Saori and Sensei. I remember it being quite "biblical", for a lack of a better word. Sensei was almost holier than thou in that moment, as he forgives her for her sins and offers her salvation. In this fic, the impression is significantly different. I almost prefer the original scene because the inclusion of Sora in this moment made it a little less remarkable.